im sorry

inverse

the inverse proportion of my life

as the number of people increases, the less chances i will talk.

i hate it. and it's true.

i know im not who i want to be. and i dont want to change myself. but i cant help but hate that aspect of my personality. i want to be me. i want to be appreciated for who i simply am. isn't it that simple?

I HATE HISTORY!!

and so...

i failed my 1st history quiz..

&^$%@#&!@#&^!

haynakooooooooo.. galit tlga ako sa history...

biruin mo, isang paragraph o isangs entence mga 3-5 times ko ng inuulit!!!!

ang formal pa kasi ng mga words ehhh.. bkt d nlng gamitin in lay man's terms?? kelangan pa pakomplikahin!!

lalo tuloy nagiign komplikado ang buhay ko!!

*nagbabasa habang kunot ang noo*

katok sa utak

alam mo minsan, sa sobrang pagkalugmok ng tao, hindi niya napapansin na dun na lamang siya naktutok. tama, may problema ka nga, pero hindi mo namamalayn na sa pagtalikod mo sa ibang bagay, mas lumalala lang ang sitwasyon. oo cguro nga mahrap yang dinadala mo pero minsan pare, wag mo nmn kami itulak. kahit mga kaibgan mo itinutulak mo palayo. hindi mo namamalayan, baka unti unti nlng sila mwala. lumalapit ako pero tinutulak mo. ano pang problema mo? obvious namang meron. pero minsan iakw na mismo ung problema. pilit kita iniintindi. nasa ugali mo na ba un? wla na bang pag-asa para ika'y magbago? baka magising ka na lng, wla na plng natira sa iyo. ive read something from a book. it sayd that sometimes, with all our hurts, we end up concentrating on them and end up ignoring the other important stuff in our lives. SOmetimes even to the point of hurting the ones we love. We are so immersed in our own sadness that we dont realize the people around us getting hurt along the way too. and yes it is possible. there might come a time that you'll regret being lonely. because it only made you even lonelier.

Ang cute cute ni Bibble!! (tma ba spelling?)

Bibble is so cuteeee!!!

tagged!

Stan tagged me in his blog. to quote him,

"I, therefore, have to post 6 weird habits on my blog and then list 6 other people I am to tag to have them do the same thing. Easy enough? Okay here goes... Ugh..."

1) Everytime before i sleep, i always raise my legs to the wall and minsan nakaktulog akong ganun.

2.) whenevr i eat. i also tend to eat the garnish dahil kuripot ako and i really see to it that wla ng tira. kugn baga patay na ang manok, papatayin ko pa ulit. wla ako ititirang laman. aside from the balat paminsan coz it's packed wd cholesterol

3.) i force myself sometimes to be ins ituations i dont want to. someone calls that habit as sadista haha. d ko lam anu un in english. i tend to do the things i hate.

4.) i always turn off everything. like stan said, ganun din ako hehe . we are the same! pati plug tatanggalin ko pa kasi it still takes up energy. and kahit mainit at pawis nako. sumtyms i dont open the elec fan to save energy. i like the feeling na super ako naiinitan kahit kadiri ung feeling. sadista nga ba?

5.) i dont fix my bed. no one fixes my bed. no one in our family fixes our beds. it's a habit. yea bad habit.

6.) sa juicer where my sister separates the ulp from the juice. i eat the pulp! sayang eh. heheh. then she drinks the juice. minsan umiinom rin ako. baka mapuno tyan ko ng fiber.


i tag these 6 people (those wd blogs):
1. trian
2. ealden
3. nikki
4. aila
5. maki
6. peter

para akong patay dito sa bahay ah. parang wla akong buhay. lagi ako mag-isa. after school, kain lunch. after lunch pahinga sandali. pagkatapos inaantok. matutulog ng 3-5 pm. tapos basa ng history tapos tulog ulit tapos dinner tapos aral ulit tapos computer aral super sandali tapos tulog na amboring... (considering andami pa bnbsa for hi166 at ayaw ko ugn subject na un. ewan ko ba, since bata ako i never learned to love history. kahit civics. yuck. at ang kapal kapal pa ng bnbsa ha. wla nmn ako nakukuha from it aside from maantok at mastran ang neck and cramped legs dahil super tutok sa aral, stiff na ktwan ko. i hate reading) RARRRRRRRRRR

Ym awardee goes to..

may isang babae sa YM ko na nag pic nya ay over ganda. sino ito? hahhaah..





YM niyoko para siret :P

hello world

dear life, i never knew id miss my siblings this much. kanina lang nagsimula ang pagiging "only child" kuno ko. hayy. nakaklungkot .. seryoso.. 6 am umalsi kami ng bahay para ihatid ang kaptid ko sa airport. after pila sandali, niyakap ng nanay ko ang kapatid ko. and after that i saw teras in their eyes. well i have to admit it. i cried too but silently. i did not hug her though kasi baka bumaha dun. ic ant stand to do it but i really wanted to. it never really dawned unto me until kanina. when i was doing something with my fone and when my mom was at the shower. the hosue was so quiet. all we had was each other. dad is always at work. so mejo mommy-daughter bonding moment ito. buong summer. grbe ha.. pero still even though im really hoemsick and lonely right now. i guess ganun dn nafefeel ng nanay ko kaya i just want to make the most out of time together. minsan lang dn mangayri ito. kaya klnina todo bonding. from attending mass, then walking to watsons and then riding the jeep twice to JRu and then to starmall and then went ot shangri-la to go to the supermarket. and then took a cab home. funny thing was when i was in the jeep, i started to recall my childhood when achie me and mama used to ride the jeep tog o to SM centerpoint. there we to the grocery adn sympre, watch movies sa UMAGA ha.. wla pa kaming last full show noon kasi wla kaming transpo. ang saya. 2 pesos lgn nun dati. and i really loved the jeep. It's fun to see differnet people. it's funny you know. I like it. :P

zzz

bakit parang hindi summer?

aside from the init. nakakbanas naman eh. bitin na bitin ako sa bakasyon. ung iba nakapagtravel sumwer. im stuk here. huhuhu.
i want some cotton candy.

ay wag bad nanaman kinakain ko hahha.

take my quiz!

Take my Quiz on QuizYourFriends.com!

long post dare to read :)

dear Lord, im so happy today. i dont know why. started out when I got to meet with my iloilo friends once again. ang saya lang to see them again. actually iba kasi sila generally. super welcoming. kumain nga kami kasama ung newly wed with his korean husband. cute cute guy. paralyzed siya but i see that he;s happy with the company of his cheerful and loving wife. alam mo Lord, ang saya sila tingnan kasi ambait ng babae. SUper bait kung makikilala sya ng tao. super bait tlga... mas msya pa kasi ung isang iloilo friend namin na nung bata pa kami ngaun lng kami ulet nagkita. hahah angs aya to catch up with htings and kwento about almost anything. nakaktuwa hahha.. pati mga rants about how dads cant stop forcing us to eat everything. dami inoorder tas pipilitin kami ubusin lahat ang sakit kaya sa tiyan. HAHAH but nevertheless, i really had a hard time. dati kasi pinsan ko natulgo dn sa bahay. dati ndi kami close ng pinsan ko pero nugn natulog sya grbe wla ng hiyaan hahha.. ganun dn nangyari with our iloilo friend. 2 nights lng sya and one whole day with him kahapon wd family. grbe puro kwento kwento at nakit ap namn si SAY! nagpapicture pa kami haha.. ang saya din kasi i got to chat again with the other iloilo friend i met last december. haha super nakaktwa sya. :) puro patawa at actions pa! bsta. im just happy. my family;s happy. now na hndi kami magksma ng shobe ko, happy pa rin. kaka webcam ko ng alng s knya kahapon. ang cute cute nya hahah. she's all grown up :)

nakadrive din ako hahah using our car yeheyy!! nahatid ko si papa to his work. fulfilling nonetheless nakaklambot ng tuhod. natulog pa ko sa tabi ni achie kagabai. ang saya. imiss the nights when katabi ko sya matulog before. bata pa kami nun hahah. achie and me. hayy memories.

BASTA. and i un know what. this holy week is really spiritually energizing. ive learned a lot. i guess so. has a lot of time to stop and think esp during lon hours in traffic :) im just hapy. i really am. :) thank you.

ty

im so happy!

all i did was color color and stamp! haha.. sumaskait kamay ko sa pagkukulay. decorating my personal memorabilia.

alam nyo,

super saya ako sa pamilya ko na hahah! ewan ko . kung meron mang mga problema dati, super ko naaappreciate sila ngaun. ang sarap sila lambingin! :) lalo na tyan ng tatay ko. sarap bilog bilogin hahaha.. bilog kasi hahaha.. bsta ewan ko.

sinasagot Nya mga dalangin ko.. and i owe it all to Him :)

thank u for my family. :P

check this out

Starring JA

Produced by JA

Directed by JA

"It's scary"- JAnno Gibbs

"pang-international"- JAya

"Two thumbs up!"- JAboom twins

HAHAHAHHAHAH!!

sad trivia

ive seen a lot of sad people. did u know that the philippines is the saddest country in asia despite we are all in smiles in every event? sa picture lang ngumingiti o pag may tao sa paligid pero sa totoo lng, hndi nmn sila msya. bakit kaya?

hug

I WUV YOU!

*hug*

48 hrs with Ja

48 hrs with Ja

apr 8 sat
1100 (am) woke up and breakfast
1130 took a bath
1200 (nn) read magazines
0100 went out to go to dentist
0200 quiapo visit someone wd mom pero wla daw
0300 had "lunch" (nacho fest)
0330 went to true value to look for adaptor
0400 went to eat "lunch again" (pasta wd stewed tomato yummy)
0430 went home
0500 pahinga / nap ATA
0800 (pm) woke up
0830 dinner ata
0900 went out to fetch achie
1000 fetched achie
1030 went to fetch papa
1100 tambay sa SM
1200 nagpagas
1230 kumakain sa mcdo ng nuggets brr ang lamig

tuloggggggggggg...

apr 9 palm sunday
730 nagpaalarm
830 bath
900 went to panciteria lido breakfast
1015 mass
1100 saaw martin along sidewalk hahaha. kakatwa toh d ko naicp makikita ko sya outside school. at 1st d ko napancn sya un. nakita ko kapatd nya sabi ko uy gwaping nakashades hahah joke. tas bglang may tumwag na "ja" tas si martin ugn ktbi ng nakashades hahah.. :P
1200 ate at emerald .. saw our long iloilo friend. laki na nya.
300 went home ksma ung iloilo visitor
330 umalis na vistor go to sm wd papa ako nsa bhay
430 umalis kami ni achie and mama to greenhills
530 shop for shobe gamit
800 kain
830 shop for shobe gamit continuation
900 supermarket
1030 uwi

bahh pagod nako

random thoughts again

natuwa ako sa forward na sinend ni aila. galing haha..

well asyd from that, i have a few thots in my mind i want to share:

on smoking:
last april 3 kumain kami sa may manila bay ata un near manila hotel. tapos andun kami open air above the water then suddenly itong babaeng ito ay tatapunin ang kanyang yosi sa dagat. ~%!^%@#^*&*@#

DONT YOU KNOW THAT NICOTINE POISONS THE FISH???!!

and if di mo lam, siguro nmn matnda ka na para malaman mo na kahit ano hindi pwede itapon sa tubig dahl dinudumihan mo ang dagat. funny how people pollute the waters/air when tthey know na kelangan nmn nila un. it's like putting poison in ur own glass of water for you to drink. pffttt..

on spitting:
may mama akong nakita sa kalye, kasama ata asawa niya. tumatawid sa kalye. ambaboy talaga. ewan ko ba akit ugali na ba yon ng pinoy na dumura kahit saan? after nya dumura hinanap ko ugn spit nya sa floor. well invisible sya d ko makita clearly pero kadiri pa rin. nung sars days, bwal un dahl the virus can spread thru air ya know. nakakinis lng kasi super hndi hygienic mga tao dito. magng madumi ka nlng sa sarili mo. bkt mo pa kelangan idamay ung iba? eh kung ikaw mama ka duraan ko sa mukha?

on standing beside the road:
after driving lesson ko, nsa kalye ako inaantay sundo ko. ewan ko ba kung sadyang nang-aasar ang mga drayber o ewan. alam mo ung itsura na kumakaway pa sayo?? parang ung mukhang nangangasar tlga na "hellloooo buhbyeeee.." tapos minsan ung ibang karpintero pa pipito pa sayo. nababstusan ako eh. kadiri. why dont they just concentrate on whatever they're doing?

about Manila:

wala naman. naicp ko lang how different it looks now compared before. ang ganda ng pagkadescribe sa mga bahay dati sa maynila. parang tipong casa manila ang dating. now all u see is buildings na super dusty na. na kahit may kulay ay mukha ng itim o gray sa malayo. maramign vandalisms at posters ng mga kumakampanya dati. nagsikalat din ang mga motel na nakita ko na regular room ay 98 pesos at ang isa ay 175 deluxe room. super sweet hotel ang name nya. cozy daw at newly renovated. just shows the values of people nowadyas. ang sad lng. pati mga nagkalat na moviehouses na pawang mga R films lng ang pinapalabas. ano nlng ang mangyaayri sa bnsa? what frustrates me the most is not the state of the country but the values na meron ang mga pinoy. ano na ang nangyari?

on call centers:

ok sana ang job na ito. ok naman tlga dahil high pay. kaso narealize ko nga tlga na ang baba na nga quality ng jobs natin. Biruin mo, ang pagiging janitor ay dpt college grad na pati ata traffic enforcer. sa unang tingin parang okay diba? pero when u look at it closely, hidni eh. parag sinabi mo na rn na ang utak ng isang college grad nant ay ganun lamang ang kakayahan. anyone can be a traffic enforcer without being a college grad. konting training lng un. SUper baba ng standards, kaya pati job quality natin bumaba. feeling ko kaya nila nirerequire na colege grad is bec iniicp nila na pag college grad ka siguro, mas disciplined ka. then again, this shows ung values natn ngaun. kelngan ba sa edukasyon pa matuutnan yon? bkt ndi nlng sa loob ng pamilya? bkt ndi tayo nahubog kahit sa family plng?

sad..

reminiscing

Lion and Khutulun love team

Khutulun: ayaw ko nga magpapicture eh!!

Bub: sige na last na ito!

Lion: go na weee!

*missing Bub*

summer pfft

sabi ng super iq test. mataas raw ako sa mechanical logical at spatial ability. hmm unusual daw ang combination na un. bakit kaya? weird.. does it justify that i also think weird? ay ewan. haynako wla nanaman ako magiging kasama dito sa bahay for the wholes summer. how sad. tapos may summer classes pa. ok back to work nako. i need to move. ndi na gumagalaw large muscle groups ko hahaha. :P PS. super ako nasayahan sa ica yclc formation camp yeheyy :P pampractice for communication skills :)

realization

ang saya balikan ng nakalipas.. mahirap balikan ang kahapon lalao na kapaga marami ang pangit na karanasan. hesitant nga ako balikan iyon pero kailanagan eh. palagi ko na lang iyon tinatakasana pero ang saya pala. binalikan ko iyon kanina. pinanatili ko lang ung sinasabi palagi ni kuya cholo.. sabi ko sa sarili ko. "ja, open heart open mind" constant un. if ever bumabalik ung doubts ko. i just repeat it again and it helps. i want to thank all of the people who helped me kanina to change how i view my past. hindi man nila alam na natulungan nila ako. salamat pa rin. un nga lang hindi ko masabi sa inyo nang harapan. salamat dahil all my life ayoko balikan ung past experiences ko. mahirap un kala mo? well akward pa rin naman kanina pero i guess open heart open mind lng tlga. i feel really blessed kasi kanina i really felt na tinutulungan ako ni Lord. Ang hirap nun pero tinulungan niya ialleviate ung nararamdaman ko. salamat Lord. salamat dahil unti-unti mong bnbago ung mentality ko ult. kung nabaluktot man siya dahil sa mga sakit nd dinanas ko dati. salamat dahil unti-unti siayng bumabalik. pare-pareho lang nmn pala tayo. i just need to appreciate kung ano tlga yung kinalakihan ko.